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Domestic disturbance

C: I am going over to Ben's house to watch a movie.
K: I thought you were driving Jennifer to the airport at 4am. Shouldn't you get some sleep?
C: I am. No. Listen, I slept really late, until 2:00 this afternoon. I'm just going to stay up until then because there is no way I am waking up at 3:30 in the morning.
K: That sounds like a really stupid idea. You're going to be tired driving and everyone else on the road will be, too. Plus what if there's a body on the road? You won't be alert enough to miss it. (getting worked up here) And if you DO hit a body, you have to STOP. I hope that is clear: any time you hit a body you have to stop the car.
C: I know that. It's not a stupid idea (pretends the mini-rant never happened) and I am going to Ben's right now. I got some ice cream.
K: Hey, I want some ice cream.
C: The seal will not be broken until I am in front of the movie. No way.
K: Yeah. What kind of ice cream?
C: (tries to think of an unappealing flavor) Cherry Peanut.
K: (stunned by audaciously horrible lying) There is no such flavor. Come on, what is it? (goes to kitchen)
C: (faces fridge in a slight crouch, arms extended) I learned this in basketball.
K: (grabs ear with right hand and twists) I learned this in mom school. (reaches with left arm through space created by dropped head, opens freezer)
C: I learned this in wrestling class.
K: (flails desperately for carton as feet leave the ground) Aaagh ... got it!

Ben & Jerry's Half-Baked.



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