I did get directions from a more adventurous employee and we drove there only to learn that I would need to bring the actual car to be registered to the office for inspection. I swear I looked at the website a dozen times and never found this requirement mentioned. With Brian sagely pronouncing that "A failure to plan is a plan to fail," we drove his stupid car back home and then they stopped being open on Saturdays and I despaired of ever registering my car in either state.
But Friday he was home and we agreed that it was a lovely day to get us some car registration. Except the phone rang that morning and a neighbor had a babysitting emergency and could we watch her kid? We could and did. She returned in the afternoon and we bustled down to Broad Street and two freaking hours later I had beautiful Ohio plates. They're lovely and all, but they actually say "Beautiful Ohio" on them, which makes them at least ten times better. And now I can park on the street without worry.
One hitch was that the title I had says Chrysler Credit owns the car. Guy number five (it takes six people to transfer your car from another state, six separate waits. Kee-razy) couldn't take my word for the fact that my fifteen-year-old car is actually paid off so the lien notice got transferred, too. There is a real title floating somewhere between here and there but until I need to sell the car it doesn't matter, right? My hat is off to you organized people who stay on top of all this stuff.