This weekend Brian hosted an Ohio Sports Spectacular for some friends. They flew in Friday* and didn't stop by the house until just after 3am. I chatted with them for an hour or so before they went to sleep; Victoria and I had to leave at 10 for her guitar lesson and they left for OSU basketball before we returned. They went on to Cincinnati for a football game and everyone dispersed shortly thereafter. So I only saw them for that short period during the wee hours after some carousing but here's the thing: they all looked old. I spent some time looking in a mirror, where any number of gray hairs were springily asserting their property rights on my head. Other than that I didn't appear too dilapidated. I was just surprised by how these guys had aged--I've seen each of them no longer than two years ago and the difference was striking.
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*By some miracle the two who were supposed to arrive during Victoria's play had their flight delayed, so Brian didn't have to leave in the middle to pick them up at the airport, thus sparing him my wrath. Like they couldn't take a cab?! Oops, sorry, that was a little leftover wrath there. Now I'm done.
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*By some miracle the two who were supposed to arrive during Victoria's play had their flight delayed, so Brian didn't have to leave in the middle to pick them up at the airport, thus sparing him my wrath. Like they couldn't take a cab?! Oops, sorry, that was a little leftover wrath there. Now I'm done.
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It's a common question, but that person really got their text twisted. The standard answer, which may or may not be absolutely true, is that a Blue Whale can ejaculate up to 400 gallons of semen but only about 10% makes it into the female.
The male Blue Whale is a ChaCha celebrity, since the organ responsible for the delivery can be eight feet long and "What is the world's largest penis?" is a question that pops up again and again.
Although for pure obnoxious I could've gone with something clue-ish.
These are actually the hardest. It can be amusing to take something innocent on that fragile left-turn-at-albequque into bawdry, but it's not much of a challenge since the gutter is where most of life ends up anyway.
When it starts off overtly sexual, being off-color just isn't that funny - using this with "Blue man group" for example would have ended up just disgusting moreso than funny.